Birthday Basics: Picking Gifts For A Four-Year-Old Girl

Edie will be four in less than two weeks. It seems quite impossible. The old saying that “the days are long but the years are short” is so completely true. Today is a Friday and usually by Friday I feel pretty bad about my stay-at-home parenting skills. I’ve lost my cool a few times and let Edie push my buttons a bit today as only an almost four-year-old can do. I think she must have asked me several times , “Are you mad, sad, or frustrated?” When my answer was simply “Yes.” Her response was “Don’t be Papa.”

It is so strange to watch your child grow from a docile lump into this person with will and opinions. That will and those opinions are often at odds with my own and a struggle ensues. I love the person she is becoming, however, and mostly I just have to learn to let her have power when appropriate and to pick my old proverbial battles.

At 4, I feel like I can begin to describe who she is as a person and while I know some of those will change, it’s still fun and fascinating. The thing is, I really like her. I feel so lucky to be her Papa and as I get to know her more I like who she is becoming.

Edie, or Edith, as she now prefers, is observant. She is quiet and often serious as she observes every single detail in her surroundings and remembers everything. Edith is kind. I have seen her offer kids a hand of help when no one is watching. I have seen her face true concerned when she sees someone else who is upset. Edith is expressive. She loves creating and dancing and painting and singing. I can’t wait to see what she creates as she ages. Edith is funny. This one is important in our family. She loves to laugh and make others laugh she will gladly fall down to get a smile from someone. Edith is perfect. I know that some parents disagree with saying that to their kids, but I tell her that almost every day. She will hear the opposite plenty in her life so I want her to know she is exactly who she should be and that she is enough.

Ok, I’ll stop gushing now. Edie is adored and she is loved. We will celebrate her with a simple party at home. Some brunch (hello…gay dads) and some cake with a gymnast design on it per her directions. We will have a few games and some face painting. Here are a few of the gifts she’s getting. Check them out for the fourish year old in your life.

(This post contains some affiliate links. This means I might get compensated at no cost to you)

1. We are big Waldorf Education fans. We hope that Edie will attend a Waldorf in the future. She learned about candle dipping at a Waldorf event and she loved it. She is getting this nice kit from one of my favorite shops, Bella Luna Toys. Check them out!

2. Edie loves taking pictures and clearly we think she’s brilliant so she’s getting a camera. This one is a good deal and is waterproof, too. A bonus for beach visits and rainy days!

3. Obviously, Edie is getting dresses from Primary. These are so cute and only $14 right now. Annnnddddd they are so soft and wash perfectly. Want to buy cute spring looks at 20% off and free shipping?? Well, here you go…
Get 20% off your first order at with code AFF20PCT

4. Ok, one more from our faves at Bella Luna. This adorable little Loom is the perfect starter model. Low commitment and low price until we see if she enjoys its. Bella Luna also has great dolls and some wonderful wooden toys as well.

5. I mentioned the face paint we will be doing at the party. It’s comes from a shop we have mentioned before, Ecokids, from our favorite state of Maine. Edie is also getting a few art supplies from them. We love their paint and their finger paint as well.

These picks are simple and hopefully help to encourage Edie to be her true self. We look forward to celebrating her and loving her more every day. We also look forward to when the tantrums stop. They do stop right?

Happy Spring. Happy Birthday, Edith Daring. You are loved.

How Not To Be Too Gross At Christmas

Halloween is over and our little Edie’s strawberry costume has been packed away and put in the cellar with the skeleton, witches, ghosts, and other decor.  So now our parental sites seem to automatically turn toward Christmas. This post is not about lamenting the fact that the stores are putting up Holiday items and some even playing music. I guess that’s just to be expected a bit at this point. I mean I have to admit I get a little excited when I start seeing some of it. I do think that this early jump start on Christmas is of course hyper-capitalism inspired  consumerism at it’s worst reminding us to spend spend spend in order to be happy and have the perfect Christmas and perfect life. A trap most of us fall for. Myself included.

Plus, poor Thanksgiving. We really love Thanksgiving in this house. My husband is basically the best non-professional cook ever. This is his favorite day of the year. He creates lists, flow charts, and plans weeks in advance. We enjoy having some of our besties over and eating until it hurts and being lazy for a few days as we begin to ease into winter in New England. And we never eat turkey! We also think gratitude is pretty important. And don’t get me wrong, I have been known to put the lights up the very day after Thanksgiving and even sometimes the live tree, which usually ends up dry as a bone by the second week of Advent and in our yard promptly by December 26th.

What I really want to talk about though is something we were recently asked by a dear friend: How do you avoid going overboard at Christmas? How do you not fall into the trap and buy way too much stuff? How do you keep it real? So, here is a list of ways to do just that. I call it:


1. Wait for it.

It is easy to fall into the trap of buying early. Edie has had a Crate and Kids catalogue for well over a month that has things circled with the letter “E” written next to them.  I find that the earlier I start, the more I buy, and let’s be honest most of our kids really do not need that much more stuff. This is something I have not always been great at and sometimes am still not. I was raised by very generous people and had very doting maternal grandparents. I never knew what it was like to not get everything on my list and then some. So try and wait until December! Heck, wait until the middle of December. There is something nice about participating in the old tradition of Advent. This is literally a time of waiting. It helps you to slow down and not rush to Christmas until Christmas. Then, you get 12 days of it! Obviously this practice can be applied in a secular way as well. So, wait!! This year we have vowed to wait for our tree until it is a bit closer to the 25th.

2. Be like Santa, make a list. 

I find that when I go to Whole Foods with Edie on a Monday without a list, I spend approximately $8,000. I buy candles, plants, soaps, cut flowers, 8 kinds of crackers and popcicles and many other items I don’t really need. The same is true with Christmas. If you go into it blindly with no real plan you overdo it. Decide how much you can really afford or want to spend then prioritize and stick with it. We like to get Edie one or two big things. This year it’ll be a crib, stroller, and high chair for her baby dolls as this is her favorite thing to do right now: “take care of her girls”, as she calls it, including her well loved-baby named Baby that is now completely legless and still fully loved. Because of this we will also be adding a new baby to her collection. This is the one we are excited to gift her this year from Hazel Village. We are always on the lookout for good dolls of color and there are simply not enough. If you do not know Hazel Village you should check them out as the stuff is amazing. We were introduced to them by our awesome friend and blogger over at Simply On Eden. To round out our list we then find something that keeps her connected to being outside (obsessed with this), something related to art and making things, and several new books.  That’s our list and we are sticking to it (my husband is reading this and will certainly hold me to it).

3. Be Green and Buy Vintage!

I mean Etsy  makes it so easy to buy vintage and handmade things. My search for baby doll furniture has lead me to look there and I will be narrowing it down soon. If you have any recommendations please let me know. For the same price you get something much more sturdy, typically made of  wood and without the packaging, and much better quality. Other things that can be bought second hand include books, board games, and fun stuff like porcelain tea sets and dollhouse furniture. Facebook market place is also a fantastic place to shop locally for used items. For clothing I sometimes use Thredup. They are great for cleaning out the closet as well and send you a big bag to send back to them. You can even get shop credit when they sell your items which means more Edie’s clothes! A great task to take care of right before or after the Holidays.

The last thing I will say is that we have learned over the few years we have been doing this that less is more. Kids really can’t play with more than about 10 toys, in total. We do have more than that still but we are constantly trying to downsize. Toys that are open ended also tend to go over better and provide longer entertainment and inspiration. So, when you get new stuff get rid of the same amount or more! This also helps with clutter and mess.

Edie will be happy to get a new dolly and a few things to go with those dollies. There are lots of kids that have far less. This is an important lesson to start teaching at a young age as well in an age appropriate way. This year we hope to give back as a family and serve a meal here or there to those in need. We also will go shopping for someone in need together. These experiences help to ensure you are raising a nice person and helps us all to battle that Christmas Gross feeling. These are just some ideas that I had. I would love to hear from you. Let us know how you can make Christmas less gross! Now, on to Thanksgiving! Oh, and a cute picture of Edie from last Christmas, of course.